The Legend of Zelda

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Zelda Games Pros and Cons by Laminated Sky

Zelda "Link's Quest"

This was the first Zelda game made, but you knew that already. Well I have beaten this game (umm the 1st quest) this is a great game, and it was for NES. The good thing about this game was, it gave you an unrealistic goal and a wooden sword... o...k.. either way, the dungeons were pretty well done, and the game wasn't really easy (not really hard either) but the negative things about it were you could only have 255 rupees, (I don't remember the reason for this but I know there is one) the Dark Nuts could only be hit from the back or side, and of course no map of the overworld.

On a side note if you enter the name ZELDA as your file name you start on the 2nd quest

Zelda II "The Adventure of Link"

The 2nd Zelda game on NES a very weird RPG like Zelda game and *the only game Link could jump in* the good thing about this game is... its... umm... unique I just don't really get the game but the good thing is Link uses Magic spells he learns from these wizards in some towns. The bad things about this game are: there is no equipment, (you need the 3 B's in every Zelda game they're accentual) the random battles are a pain in the ass, there are people who turn into bats in some towns, only 3 lives which is a fucking pain `cuz this game is kinda hard, and the fact that his sword is the same color as him, and he heals by going into women`s houses is very, very weird. There are more flaws with this game like super accurate dinosaurs, invisible ghosts, a hidden town.

Side note for this game is I never beat this one I`m still stuck at the last temple by the time I get there I lost a live then I loss my other to trying to navigate the maze.

The Legend of Zelda: A Link to The Past

This game is the best IMO of course and has probably the most positive points that I can come up with, ehem: lots of equipment, 4 different swords, 3 different tunics, 3 different shields, 2 boomerangs, 2 different bows (well arrows), loads of bosses and dungeons, a MAP and a fairly good one at that. It also has a storyline, mini games, heart pieces (rather then the full hearts or health bar extension) and intertwine worlds Light and Dark. As for negative points I don`t really have any... o okay I got one the story line is stolen from episode 4 of Star Wars? Um well okay the annoying low health sound is there but that`s the only thing I`d figure is wrong.

A side note here do you think the words "A Link to The Past" is a pun referring to both the main character Link and the word link? Or perhaps is just an odd co-incidence?

The Legend of Zelda: Link`s Awakening

Other then the fact this game is a bit to like Mario in some parts it`s not a bad game. As far as it goes for GB games this is one of the best original GB games. Well I kinda lost this game when I was younger so, I would like to say thanks to this game I found out what a pillar is, but I digress I never beat this game and I don`t even remember how far I got in it but I do remember it was a fairly decent Zelda game.

A side note for here could be something I figure out on my own. If you steal a shield from the shop owner (I think you run around him 3 times or something) that girl Malon will call you a "THIEF!" and if you go back in the store the shopkeeper makes Gannon seem weak in comparison by killing you in one hit.

The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time

Is probably about 83% of most people favorite Zelda game (and my 2nd favorite). This is the story about a kid who lives in the forest and can`t get a fairy. This was the first Zelda done in 3D which makes it more epic then it is, but, it is epic as a Zelda game and a Nintendo game. This game has uniqueness to it, it is the only Zelda game where you can play as the older and younger versions of Link. This game has a large amount of dungeons, unique bosses, mini games, trials, and such. It also has a variety of equipment. The most noticeable thing that I think makes this game awesome is the fact that Link can use a broad sword (the Biggorons Sword). Some negatives are: you can`t use the equipment that you used as a kid when your an adult, any part of the game w/a time limit, the fact you have to sneak around the Thieve`s Den. Link is a swordsman can`t he like not get caught by a bunch of women w/pikes? He just surrenders like a little bitch. Also if you get the scarecrows song you have to memorize it and that`s kinda irritating.

Side note here is the people Saria, Darunia, Ruto, Nabooru, Impa, and Rauru whom are all sages are also town names in the 2nd Zelda weird huh?

The Legend of Zelda: Majora`s Mask

Is a kinda "gaiden" to OoT where Link takes his horse Epona to Termina after some weird shit with the Skullkid he turns into a Deku. Basically this game has a time limit that can be reset at anytime if you have your ocarina you will however lose any rupees, arrows, bombs, and anything that can be in a quantity. The positives about this game is the fact that you can transform w/certain masks and you can have basically an infinite supply of rupees because there is a bank that isn`t affected by the time warp... weird. Some negatives are the annoying time limit, only a few bosses, and collecting heart pieces. With only 4 bosses that give you heart pieces you have to look for a lot of them because having 7 hearts just sucks.

A side note in this maze game in Clock Town (creative name huh?) there is a girl that charges you different prices depending on how you look. (ain`t that a bitch?) 20 for the Goron 15 for the Deku 10 for Link and 5 for the Zora. She must be rasict or something notice the Deku and the Goron cost the most well there skin is darker?

O yeah did you know gaiden means side story?

The Legend(s) of Zelda: Oracle of Ages & Oracle of Seasons

Shigeru Miyamoto pulled off a Pokémon. He made two games very similar, but unlike Pokémon these games are actually different story lines. Seasons take place in Holodrum, well Ages takes place in Labrynna. If you beat both games you could unlock new equipment and larger seed satchel. These games were and still are great Zelda games I ha(d)(ve) both games if that makes sense I actually lost my Seasons, but my Ages is still somewhere in my house. In these games you can fight Twinrova and Gannon if you beat both games. These games are great individually and better when you have both. Some negatives are: even after beating Ages I still get stuck at some points, well maybe that`s my own stupidity. The only other thing I find kind of annoying is you can`t face Gannon unless you have both games.

Side notes again, for Ages; in the ever lasting trading sequence you actually get a bag of shit, that`s right a bag of shit. In Seasons there are these people that wear big ass hoods know as Suburbians... I live in a Suburb ghetto and we all dress like that weird... actually they are called: Subrosians

The Legend of Zelda: Four Swords

Named "four" swords `cuz four people can play as different colored Links, this will be short. The good thing about this game is it is the 1st multiplayer Zelda game ever. This game was intertwine w/A Link to The Past when it got ported onto GBA. The main negative is that the game is really short and you need another person to play, it is not a single player game at all.

If you beat this game you can play an extra dungeon in Lttp

The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker

Was probably the most underrated Zelda game ever, but if you played it, it was a great game, none the less. The reason I believe this game was so underrated (and probably the only reason) was because after people played OoT and MM they wanted to see a nicely done Zelda game with cool knew graphics. Therefore when the angry nerds saw the cartoonish version of Link they were bitching that it wasn`t a Zelda game or some shit like that. Well I don`t judge most things by graphics, reality has amazing graphics, and I don`t like it, that`s why I play video games. Anyway, this game only has a few dungeons before Gannon like 5 I think. It is very annoying, that you have to fill up your map or you`ll lose your place sometimes. Lastly the whole "Great Sea" thing is boring, going around in a boat for 10 minutes looking for some damn island.

Another side note the "Great Sea" isn`t very great I mean it will kinda drown you if you swim to long I think it`s cursed the name is kind of ironic.

The Legend of Zelda: Four Sword Adventure

Is an awesome multiplayer game w/the use of the GBA it is a great game. Things that are cool about this game well it is a multiplayer game (only 14.3% of Zelda games are multi.). There is co-op which is adventure mode, and there is battle mode where you beat the shit out of each other with various weapons that can be pick up. Another thing is this game is also single player also and you can use the Gamecube controller. Downsides are GBA graphics, and you need the GBA-GCN connecter to play multiplayer.

A side note is you can pick up your allies and use them as weapons its some how amusing.

The Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap

In this Link can shrink into a minish size (minish are little creature that can only be seen by children...). The hat know as Ezlo "the Minish cap" was a wizard that caught turned into a hat by the evil sorcerer name Vaati. Anyway you take the annoying cap w/you to get these gem things I forgot what they are called. Well these gem things fuse with the Picori Sword to create the four sword! But you don`t split into different people... You do however have the ability to create clone like images of yourself when you stand over these colorful glowing spots. This game isn`t very hard at all it is kinda weird, but it is still a cool game `cuz you can learn different techniques from these swordmasters. Like Breaking pots, shooting beams, spinning like a crackhead etc.

A side note here this game has more unique weapons then most Zelda games like the gust jar, cane of pacci or remote bombs

The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess

This is the best Zelda game graphic wise and to quote myself "reality has amazing graphics, and I don`t like it, that`s why I play video games" in other words graphics don`t matter much to me, but the storyline is quite nice and the ability to be a wolf is kinda cool. This game has great graphics, nice storyline, sweet gameplay, and some awesome dungeons; so where is its flaws? In the boss battles most of these bosses suck like nothing: 1st boss that baba tri-headed thing it was done okay could be stronger. 2nd boss OMFG so easy less then a minute. 3rd boss is okay `cuz your underwater. 4th is actually the only fairly decent fight. 5th the fight is very retarded but Yeta is no pushover. 6th Gohma isnt that hard not to say she`s easy. The 7th the Argorok dragon, damn why couldn`t they have made him stronger that boss is so fun to fight. As for Zant he is kinda difficult. Zelda isn`t hard at all. Gannon is annoying sometimes if you don`t know what to do he is. Anyway when they are on the horses they are somewhat annoying. As for Gannondorf he is well lets just say Link has a secret weapon more destructive then the Master Sword.

The secret weaon that Link can use to defeat Gannondorf is........ the.......fishing rod. It is funny `cuz if you pull out the fishing rod the look on his face is priceless it looks like he would say "....Okay what the fuck is wrong with this kid a fishing rod I should just stab the little fucker... AHRGH I cant look away it is just so mesmerizing"

The Legend of Zelda: The Phantom Hourglass

I have only played this for about 3 hours and beat only 2 bosses so unless there are 20 bosses this game wouldn`t be that hard a believe there are 8 bosses? This game has some weird ass graphics but that doesn`t matter the over all game play is okay. The thing that creeps me the fuck out is why are the boss keys so large? Guess thats why they call them "Big Keys". Well that`s it i haven`t played enough of this game to give you an opinion on it.

Last note do you have to ask someone for alka-seltzer by yelling at the game? I thought I heard my cousin yell "I NEED ALKA-SELTZER" he said "the louder you yell the cheaper it is"