Difference between revisions of "Chilliwack, BC"
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Chilliwack has about 60,000 residents. There's probably about 300 Asians, 5 African-Americans, 3 East Indians, 35,000 white people, and the rest First Nations people. As mentioned above, the town is surrounded by Indian reserves, so a very large number of Chilliwack's residents are drunk, poor, drug-addicted Native people. There's a bunch of homeless people too. Chilliwack also holds a Canadian record for most Churches per capita, as well as most grow-ops per capita...put that one together. | Chilliwack has about 60,000 residents. There's probably about 300 Asians, 5 African-Americans, 3 East Indians, 35,000 white people, and the rest First Nations people. As mentioned above, the town is surrounded by Indian reserves, so a very large number of Chilliwack's residents are drunk, poor, drug-addicted Native people. There's a bunch of homeless people too. Chilliwack also holds a Canadian record for most Churches per capita, as well as most grow-ops per capita...put that one together. | ||
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== City Centre == | == City Centre == | ||
Chilliwack's downtown core is marked by Five Corners, a square that no one except Chilliwack drivers can seem to handle. At least half of the downtown core's businesses are abandoned. | Chilliwack's downtown core is marked by Five Corners, a square that no one except Chilliwack drivers can seem to handle. At least half of the downtown core's businesses are abandoned. | ||
| + | |||
| + | ==Notable Residents== | ||
| + | Chilliwack's most famous resident is [[Patrick Gallagher]]. | ||
| + | Chilliwack's other residents include: | ||
| + | * [[Ross Rifle]] and [[Chainsaw Symphony]]. | ||
| + | * The Heavy Metal Hobo-''once sold Ross Rifle the Alice Cooper issue of Rock N Roll Comics'' | ||
| + | * Crazy Lady-''crazy old bitch who once lived down the street from Ross. She liked to run outside naked...'' | ||
| + | * Mullet Man-''the infamous Mullet Man used to ride around town on his bike talking to himself.'' | ||
| + | * Crazy Bike Guy-''once pulled a knife on Ross' mom.'' | ||
| + | * Redbeard-''this homeless guy that Ross talks to. He rides his bike alot and is really nice.'' | ||
| + | * Patrick-''an old high school friend of Chainsaw Symphony. He fell into hard drugs and is now a complete idiot.'' | ||
Revision as of 00:19, 18 February 2008
Chilliwack, British Columbia, is the shittiest shit town to ever shit. It's approximately 100 km from Vancouver, BC. It is Ross Rifle's home town, as well as home base for Chainsaw Symphony.
History
Chilliwack's first inhabitants were the Kipp family in the late 1800s. Throughout the 20th Century, Chilliwack grew. That's about it.
Region
Chilliwack sits in the middle of the beautiful Fraser Valley. It is bordered at the South by the Vedder River and at the North by the Fraser River. Chilliwack is surrounded by mountains and forest. It's also surrounded by Indian reserves, which isn't the best.
Demographic
Chilliwack has about 60,000 residents. There's probably about 300 Asians, 5 African-Americans, 3 East Indians, 35,000 white people, and the rest First Nations people. As mentioned above, the town is surrounded by Indian reserves, so a very large number of Chilliwack's residents are drunk, poor, drug-addicted Native people. There's a bunch of homeless people too. Chilliwack also holds a Canadian record for most Churches per capita, as well as most grow-ops per capita...put that one together.
City Centre
Chilliwack's downtown core is marked by Five Corners, a square that no one except Chilliwack drivers can seem to handle. At least half of the downtown core's businesses are abandoned.
Notable Residents
Chilliwack's most famous resident is Patrick Gallagher. Chilliwack's other residents include:
- Ross Rifle and Chainsaw Symphony.
- The Heavy Metal Hobo-once sold Ross Rifle the Alice Cooper issue of Rock N Roll Comics
- Crazy Lady-crazy old bitch who once lived down the street from Ross. She liked to run outside naked...
- Mullet Man-the infamous Mullet Man used to ride around town on his bike talking to himself.
- Crazy Bike Guy-once pulled a knife on Ross' mom.
- Redbeard-this homeless guy that Ross talks to. He rides his bike alot and is really nice.
- Patrick-an old high school friend of Chainsaw Symphony. He fell into hard drugs and is now a complete idiot.
Problems
Chilliwack is a fucking dump that should never be visited. Sometimes it gets scary walking at noon. There's a shitload of cracked out Natives and homeless people, and not nearly enough cops. There's gangs, a massive drug industry, and a large amount of prostitutes. Basically, all the problems of a major city, crammed into a small town. When driving down Yale, Chilliwack's #1 main road, you are guaranteed to see at least one of the following: hooker, crack head, teenage mother.
Another major problem is that the City is tearing down all of Chilliwack's houses and putting up apartments. It's fucking ridiculous. Ross Rifle is particularly angered as many of Chilliwack's houses are around 100 years old (his was built in 1888, the same year Jack the Ripper was running around ruining the shit of hookers in London).
The whole atmosphere of the town creates a very hostile environment. As a result, Chilliwack has greatly contributed to the crime rate in BC, and school fight videos on Youtube.
It also doesn't help that ol' Wheels (Mayor Sam Sullivan) in Vancouver is clearing out his town for the 2010 Olympics and sending all the dregs of society to outlying town, without giving a shit.
Thoughts
Chilliwack sucks, and I want out-Ross Rifle
