World of Warcraft

Warcraft

This game is based on the Warcraft series. Prior Warcraft titles were RTS games.

Char Aznable Explains WoW

Ah, nothing like a nice game of World of Warbullshit.

A boring work simulator that allows people with no friends to play a gimped version of D&D and lose 10 gigs of hard drive space. Apparently William Shatner and Mr. T play it, but we all know this is bullshit as The Shat is busy scoring with hot alien babes and Mr. T is busy pitying fools and drinking milk.

But I play WoW! What should I do?

Relax, usually the WoW experience goes one of two ways:

A. Boring (Yawn)

• The player gets to around level 10, realizes how boring the game is, and moves on to something better like The Specialists.

B. Addictive

• The player gets hooked, becomes an addict, gets to level 70 on three separate characters, and never shuts the hell up like grinding some monsters and watching attack animations is some form of accomplishment. Meanwhile, these people usually have either no job, no social life, or neither and are living with their parents.

B². Reaction to B

• So if B happens to you, you're screwed. But fret not, because asking for help is the first step to recovery! It looks to me like you'll take the A path. Just remember, it doesn't matter how many attack animations you watch, but how many haters you cap in The Specialists or Team Fortress 2, games that are both more fun and less time-consuming than World of Workcraft.

A World of Cockcraft anecdote by Ross Rifle

My buddy and I were in the bank, and this hot banker calls us over to her counter. So we walk over, say hi, sneak a few peeks at her insatiable rack, and she asks us:

"Hey, do you guys play computer games?"

We say no, but we are knowledged in the field. So she tells us that she's been playing this game, but she won't tell us which one. I instantly guess World of Fuckcraft, and she goes kinda red. I guess she just levelled up before work and wanted real bad to tell someone. Living proof that sometimes, the person controlling that large breasted, blond Level 20 Elven Cleric whatever-the-fuck is actually a hot chick.

And trust me, she was HOT.