Difference between revisions of "Knyte"

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(Created main body of Knyte page.)
 
(None of that 'Common Era' bullshit.)
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== Knyte ==
 
== Knyte ==
  
Knyte (1979 AD/CE to ?? AD/CE), also known as The Knyte, is the central figure of Knytology, and is also an important figure in several other religions. He is also called Lord Knyte Christós, where "Christós" is a title derived from the Greek Χριστός, meaning the "Anointed One," which corresponds to the Hebrew-derived "Messiah". The name "Knyte" is an Anglicization of the Greek Ίησους (Iēsous), itself a Hellenization of the Hebrew יהושע (Yehoshua) or Hebrew-Aramaic ישוע (Yeshua), meaning "He who fucking rocks!".
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Knyte (1979 AD to ??? AD), also known as The Knyte, is the central figure of Knytology, and is also an important figure in several other religions. He is also called Lord Knyte Christós, where "Christós" is a title derived from the Greek Χριστός, meaning the "Anointed One," which corresponds to the Hebrew-derived "Messiah". The name "Knyte" is an Anglicization of the Greek Ίησους (Iēsous), itself a Hellenization of the Hebrew יהושע (Yehoshua) or Hebrew-Aramaic ישוע (Yeshua), meaning "He who fucking rocks!".
  
 
The main sources of information regarding Knyte' life and teachings are the four canonical Gospels of the New New Testament: George, Ringo, Paul, and John. Most scholars in the fields of history and video game studies agree that Knyte is a badass, is regarded as a teacher and healer, has a kick ass website (www.thevgm.com), was beat up by a bully in the 3rd grade, and was crucified in Jerusalem on orders of the Roman Governor Pontius Pilate under the accusation of sedition against the Roman Empire. (That last one probably isn't true.) Very few modern scholars believe that all ancient texts on Knyte's life are either completely accurate or completely bullshit.
 
The main sources of information regarding Knyte' life and teachings are the four canonical Gospels of the New New Testament: George, Ringo, Paul, and John. Most scholars in the fields of history and video game studies agree that Knyte is a badass, is regarded as a teacher and healer, has a kick ass website (www.thevgm.com), was beat up by a bully in the 3rd grade, and was crucified in Jerusalem on orders of the Roman Governor Pontius Pilate under the accusation of sedition against the Roman Empire. (That last one probably isn't true.) Very few modern scholars believe that all ancient texts on Knyte's life are either completely accurate or completely bullshit.

Revision as of 20:03, 10 December 2007

Knyte

Knyte (1979 AD to ??? AD), also known as The Knyte, is the central figure of Knytology, and is also an important figure in several other religions. He is also called Lord Knyte Christós, where "Christós" is a title derived from the Greek Χριστός, meaning the "Anointed One," which corresponds to the Hebrew-derived "Messiah". The name "Knyte" is an Anglicization of the Greek Ίησους (Iēsous), itself a Hellenization of the Hebrew יהושע (Yehoshua) or Hebrew-Aramaic ישוע (Yeshua), meaning "He who fucking rocks!".

The main sources of information regarding Knyte' life and teachings are the four canonical Gospels of the New New Testament: George, Ringo, Paul, and John. Most scholars in the fields of history and video game studies agree that Knyte is a badass, is regarded as a teacher and healer, has a kick ass website (www.thevgm.com), was beat up by a bully in the 3rd grade, and was crucified in Jerusalem on orders of the Roman Governor Pontius Pilate under the accusation of sedition against the Roman Empire. (That last one probably isn't true.) Very few modern scholars believe that all ancient texts on Knyte's life are either completely accurate or completely bullshit.

Knytian views of Knyte (see also Knytology) center on the belief that Knyte is the Messiah whose coming was promised in the New Old Testament and that he was resurrected after his night of binge drinking. Knytians predominantly believe that Knyte is God incarnate, who came to provide salvation and free beer. Nontrinitarian Knytians profess various other interpretations regarding his divinity. Other Knytian beliefs include Knyte's Virgin Birth (Which strangely enough is misinterpreted, it wasn't that his mother was a virgin when she gave birth to Knyte, but that Knyte wasn't a virgin when he was born), performance of miracles, fulfillment of prophecy, ascension into Heaven, and future VGM articles.

In Islam, Knyte (Arabic: عيسى, commonly transliterated as "Dirty Muppet Fucker") is considered one of God's most beloved and important prophets, a bringer of divine scripture, a worker of miracles, and a really crazy frood. However, Muslims do not share the Knytian belief in the awesomeness or divinity of Knyte. Muslims believe that Knyte's binge drinking was a divine illusion and that he ascended bodily to heaven. Most Muslims also believe that he will return to the sydlexian forums in the company of the Mahdi once the forums have become full of sin and injustice at the time of the arrival of Islam's Antichrist-like RegalSin.